I've started and stopped writing this post two times already. Maybe 3rd time's the charm. Every time I sat down to write it, it sounded like I was complaining or unhappy with my roles as wife and mother. It's not that at all!!! I adore my roles as wife and mommy, two roles that I would never give up. They are the highest calling and I'm glad that I had enough sense to say, "yes." I am so blessed and lucky that the love of my life chose me to be his wife. I'm so blessed to have my two beautiful children who bring laughter and sunshine to my life on a daily basis.
But I discovered something. Well maybe not discovered, more like remembered. I remembered that I am more than a mommy. I am a friend, a confidant, a dreamer. I am a person who has dreams, aspirations, and goals. I am so accustomed to being my family's biggest cheerleader that sometimes I forget to be my own.
I woke up so early on Saturday and when I called my husband hours later to chat he laughed when I told him I was up at the crack of dawn. He said, "You don't know what what to do with yourself, do you?" I really didn't. I'm so used to having a few minutes to myself in the morning and then being there for the kids the rest of the day. Being away forced me to be selfish and create my own timetable. What a glorious and luxurious weekend it was. I was able to read, write, finish one of my long-standing projects (my son's baby book, woohoo!), talk for hours with my best friends over mugs of hot tea and good music, appreciate my husband who is home with the kids, and just take time to do whatever I wanted. This was the perfect weekend for this discombobulated mommy. I felt like I could go back renewed to my family and give them everything that I have, again.
I was reading my Real Simple magazine this morning and came across an article "10 Secrets of an unflappable working mom" by Michelle Slatalla. It was #10 that struck me most, especially as I tried to convey in this post how refreshing it was to remember that I was "more than...." and kept failing to do so without sounding like I was unhappy or complaining. Just the opposite. I was and am pumped to rediscover parts of me that I have neglected. It was like finding a $20 bill in a jacket pocket that you haven't worn since last season. Ahhhh, I'm wife and mommy, but I'm me, too. That's what it is.
Here is a part of the article from Michelle Slatalla:
#10 STOP THINKING OF YOURSELF AS SPLIT INTO SEPARATE BUT EQUAL ROLES MOTHER, WORKER, ME. Listen to philosopher John Locke, who said that a person recognizes himself as the same being throughout his life, in different times and places. You are one person, invisible, who just happens to wear many hats...