Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls." (Matthew 11:28-29)
Being on doctor's orders to be on "restricted activity" has made me reevaluate what I need to do versus what I'd like to do. I'd like to do a lot. There are so many things on my to-do list that I never ever get it done. If I can get 5 things done a day, I'm a happy camper. Having to reevaluate and decide what actually needs to get done has been really helpful. I really do feel the stress leaving me.
I've been trying to take it easy and I've been lucky enough to have one lunch date and one playdate this week. Hanging out with other adults, even if only for an hour, has really improved my disposition. So has being able to "let things go." So the house isn't perfect. So what. So the laundry isn't done. So what. My kids are happy, fed, clothed, and housed. I think we're doing all right.
I did wake up this morning in a bit of a panic. My friend D. was coming to down with his daughter for a playdate and I got up at 9am. This is unheard of, but I was struck again with pregnancy insomnia at 4 this morning and managed to get back to sleep around 5:30am. My son woke me up at 7:30am and my response was, "Here's PBS, can you watch some tv while Mama sleeps?" He sat in bed with me. When I finally got up at 9am I realized I needed to shower and feed the kids because he would be here anytime. Lo and behold he got there as I was feeding the kids breakfast.
While I realized that the house was not in the state that I wanted it to be in and I was barely ready for the day, I decided to let it go. So what? Right? I've known D. and his wife A. for 13 years. We went to college together, vacationed together, and they've seen me through some of my worst times. Through it all we've been there for each other. So I let it go. He was there to give me a hand with the kids and not to judge. For that I was grateful.
After a playdate at the park and lunch out with the kids. We came back, put the kids down for a nap. I ran an errand, he helped tidy up the kitchen for me and then we chatted until his daughter woke up from a nap.
He kept saying, "Just relax. That's why I'm here." Being so type-A it's hard for me to sit back while people are at me house and for me not do something. But I promised his wife last week that I would do just that. Let them help me when I needed it.
So I did. I'm learning to overcome my weariness and to find rest. Thank you to all of my good friends and family for your words of encouragement, offers to let me rest, and for your unending help and support. xoxo